’ Ruth’s boyfriend Alex was a vegan. Ivy wrinkled her nose. ‘Soya milk in coffee? That’s disgusting.’ Ruth laughed. ‘Oh come on, it’s not that bad.’ ‘Where’s the nearest shop?’ ‘There’s a farm shop on site, not far. I can show you.’ ‘I’ll just grab my purse.’ On the short walk over Ruth explained that she’d started working at the shop two days a week. Sally the farm shop manager had gone part time, her dad had moved into nursing home recently after having a stroke and she needed more time to. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making love?" Yes, I remember," said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.The husband continued. "Do you remember when he shoved that shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or spend 20 years in jail?'" I remember that too," she replied softly.He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "You know ... I would have gotten out today."Short onesHow many women does it take to change a light. He might be depressed." I remember the year when my dog had canine depression," I responded. "She wouldn't eat anything but McDonald's Quarter Pounders with cheese." How did you know it was McDonalds?" he asked."Trial and error." I don't want to feed my dog McDonalds," he typed, adding a frowning smilie."Your dog isn't depressed," I told him. "Canine depression is really rare." They told me at the shelter he might be, coming from his old family." Well he must have eaten at the shelter, right?. She let out a piercing scream...“OK, OK, you smug bastard,I can’t parallel park. You do it!”“Okay class. Now I’m going to say a famous quote, and the first person to tell me who said that quote, can have Monday off.” said the teacher.“Who is credited with writing the phrase, To be or not to be, that is the question?” asked the teacher.Little Pham Lam Nguyen at the front of the class called out, “Shakespeare”.“Well done!” said the teacher, “You can have Monday off.”“No thank you Miss. I am of.
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